Another expression: “It’s always darkest, before the dawn”, could apply to many situations. Sometimes, it feels the absolute worst just before you make a breakthrough: your feelings, your situation, your hopes, dreams, expectations. It doesn’t matter what – the pattern is the same. News often carries the story of a tragedy. Then, you discover the accused had something happen to them just before they performed an awful act: fired, rejected, bullied, abandoned. The list goes on and on.
It begs the question: did they not have an emotional anchor to help them through their darkest moments…just before they reacted negatively? Where do you get such an anchor…and what is it, really?
Emotions, I believe, are similar to muscles. The more you use them, the more you shape them. The stronger they become: either well-defined or bigger, stronger. The same with emotions. What you do with them shapes you: happier, sadder, able to cope, or ready to give up, give in, give over. And, in extreme cases, get even.
Emotions are infectious. One person’s emotional energy can change an atmosphere. Sometimes, it’s good, where a happy person can bring a smile to others. It seems to lighten their moods. Anger can darken the moods of others, and make them think dark thoughts, too. Constantly feeding your emotions thoughts of anger, rejection, or upset can make some people do dark things. But, if they had a way to control those thoughts, perhaps, they would think twice before committing erroneous behavior.
What is an emotional anchor, and how do you get one?
Well, what is sculpted muscle? It is a part of you that you work on, practice with, exercise over and over again. So, too, is an emotional anchor. It is the practice of deciding to do something, and practicing it over and over again. The anchor part comes with choosing a thought that makes it all worthwhile: love of someone or something. It is a belief that makes Life all worthwhile.
If you haven’t chosen a Reason to Live in your life, it’s never to late. It could be a person, a philosophy, a responsibility. It’s just important to have one. You get to chose whichever one you want. But, like a ticket to the movies, you need one to hold on to during the rough times in your life.
Believing there is an Intelligence that has shaped the Universe which has a personal interest in me is one I chose to believe. This has helped me through the Lessons of my Life. I chose to believe it. I have the right to do that. It has helped me through some very dark nights. But, mostly, I have had to learn to like myself, become a friend to myself, forgive myself for things in the past. There is nothing worse than not liking yourself. It’s the first thing you need to work on. Your entire body will know if you don’t. It will also react to that as very bad news.
Perhaps, one of the most important, is the urging: “Never give up!” Whether it means “don’t stop believing”, like a popular Journey song, or a special way of saying “have some faith”, it means continue on, even when it looks darkest. Even if you think you won’t “make it”, keep trying. You’re efforts are never in vain. When you “make it through”, you’ll be glad you never gave up.
There’s one more saying that comes to mind: “If you don’t use it, you’ll lose it.” Back to the muscle again: Practice what you want to happen…and it will. While, perhaps, simplistic, these sayings are born of truth….somebody’s, anyway. They have lasted over time because others have related to them. Proving they must contain some kernel of truth…if only to those who remembered them. These are some of the emotional “muscles” that have gotten us through Life. And, you’re here, so good for you! You haven’t given up, and don’t…ever!
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